The thing is, there is some stigma with being a working mother. These days, yes, the economy calls for down-sizing. So maybe that does require a parent to stay at home rather than pay a similar amount to a stranger to take care of said baby. And yes, I DO involve myself in things that interest me beyond the pooping, eating and sleeping schedule of my baby and I am NOT male, I promise. Is that wrong - that I am a mother who does not eat, sleep and breathe in sync with her newborn's schedule? And if it IS okay, how do I navigate that working world while letting my young one know I care as much as the next dedicated mother?
How DID it end up that males got all the breaks? Oh, I know, they don't always have it easy, but in this instance, they do. I mean, no one looks twice when they hold a beer and their baby at the same time; no one glances at their "size" while walking down Aisle 10 at the grocery store; no one EXPECTS them to pick up the baby if s/he gets hungry (and therefore screams) at a restaurant. There are just some things forever linked to motherhood - for which we (moms) will always be responsible for being (or not being, but suffering the cost).
The burden we bear is great, but I don't care. I bear the burden and ignore the stigma. Here is my vow - I WILL be a new mother who spends as much time with her daughter as she can. I WILL be a new mother who graduates with her dissertation in May of 2011. I WILL be the mother who loses her "baby fat" in less time than it took to acquire it.
Where is the "like" button for this?! I love it! And yes you will lose the baby fat...so far I have lost the baby weight, just not the extra fat (working on it though!!)! You have every right to your life, and enjoy the ride! Can I add to your list that I personally would love to travel, sans the 2 mini "we's"! Is that bad? I refuse to be the parent who never leaves their children with a sitter, or grandma so I can go out and enjoy a little grown up time! But it is a challenge! One worth accepting!!
ReplyDeleteThings don't change. What exists as stigma today, you can multiply by 10 for 30 years ago when your own mother returned to work... And to school... And did church work... And, and, and. I can only give you the benefit of the wisdom I've accumulated through the years, conquering (notice the present tense?) my own fears, insecurities, and prejudices.
ReplyDeleteYour faith in God and His provision for your life will get you through any situation.
Praying for your daughter today, and every day her life will help you to realize that she is not yours, but only on loan to you from Him who gave her to you.
He loves her more than you ever could, or will... And that in and of itself will give you peace and perspective. He holds her in the palm of His hand, and will never let her go.
You are a Psalm 31 wife and mother. Look her up and feel proud that your heritage goes back thousands of years. Contrary to what modern pundits would have you think, women have worked outside the home (and IN the home) from the beginning of time. Be not guilt-ridden, but be proud of the heritage you are creating for your daughter. It is a heritage that I passed on proudly to my own daughters and one that makes my heart joyful.
Forge on!