The "Happiness Recipe"

I am learning.  I am learning that this blog is about being busy so I can't actually be posting as often as I would like, though I have material galore.  I am learning that there are times when I am going to have to break my rule and work while Samara is laughing and cooing with her father.  And I am learning that the hurdles keep on coming and sometimes get higher than the ones over which you jumped the day before.

You know the saying, "A happy wife is a happy life."?  I sometimes wonder what it is that makes me happy.  This is NOT to say that I'm not happy, because I am.  I just wonder what my "happiness recipe" is.  Is it being a mother?  Is it being a partner with my husband?  Is it working for what I believe in?   Is it my relationship with Christ?  Is it fellowship with my friends and family?  Is it walking my dogs?  Is it dancing?  Is it a nice sweat while working out at the gym?  Is it teaching others?  Is it research and writing?  And as recipes usually go, it is a little bit of each.  Contentment for me is a fine balance between all of those, with a few gorgoues sunsets and observed random acts of kindness sprinkled in along the way...

And I think that is the exact problem with life.  Sometimes the ingredients get spoiled and you must wait for the recipe to balance out again.  I pulled my back out yesterday.  This means I cannot hold Samara - not a happy mother.  I cannot help around the house - not a happy partner.  I cannot walk my dogs, I cannot dance, and I cannot work out.

One rather important process involved in my "happiness recipe" is the way these ingredients are baked.  For me, I cannot let one element linger too long without being fulfilled, or else I get antsy.   I used to tell people that "Efficient" was my middle name.  I think that would be a misnomer for me, these days, and may be the source of my stress.  I have the ingredients sprinkled in, and though my back is certainly a wrench in the works, it isn't the problem.  I like schedules, I like timeliness.  This, of course, isn't really possible so I am learning to strike a balance.  In my long list of "to-dos" one of them is to complete my two Baltiomre contracts on time - tomorrow.  I spent all of last night and into the morning working on evaluations.  I did not get much sleep, but I think I am happier than yesterday..  I NEED closure. I need to check something off my checklist. I need to meet a deadline that I've set.  I need... So I will do.