Love is…

A note from your husband telling you he can’t wait for you to finish your dissertation for selfish reasons – that he’d like to spend time with you again.  And while I know that is true, I suspect that my finishing would be pleasant for him because he would no longer be a single dad for most of the week.  To him, my finishing soon would mean that I could either work late at night or early in the morning or all weekend – not all three, every day, every week, endlessly.

And if, for one minute, I allow myself to bask in the glory of that wonderful message – that my husband, my best friend, is getting impatient to spend time with me again – I am vulnerable to an increasingly apparent fact in my life:  I am so damned lucky.   It is a vulnerability of sorts because I do, in fact, have everything in the world that I want.  And to finish this large project and be with my family, to finally be a part of their growth, love, laughter, cries, frustrations… phew!  Awesomeness.

Folks, the best part is: I’m on track for the deadline I set a month ago.  It hasn’t been easy – I wake at 4:30am, go to bed at midnight, and work all day Saturday.  I no longer go to the gym.  I sometimes have to do work instead of research, but I’m still on track and that is what counts.  I’m not revealing my deadline because I feel that the I sort of get jinxed every time I do, but I’m close enough that I think I’ll be confident to tell you in March.  And at this rate, that may be the next time I post.

Love is… the best family in the world – beyond my husband, of course – but especially my husband.